Blogging While Paused

Those executives and their secrets… It’s getting so it’s hard to leak anything to the public anymore. Well, your speculation is as good as mine at this point, but we know for certain that Nintendo is releasing a new console soon. To whom it may concern: Re: Wii’s successor system Nintendo Co., Ltd. has decided to launch in 2012 a system to succeed Wii, which the company has sold 86.01 million units on a consolidated shipment basis between its launch in 2006 and the end of March 2011. We will show a playable model of the new system and announce more specifications at the E3 Expo, which will be held June 7-9, 2011, in Los Angeles. Sales of this new system have not been included in the financial forecasts announced today for the fiscal term ending March 2012. There’s lots of rumors flying around about this “Project Café”, so allow  [ Read More ]

I must be having a run of bad luck. First I got stuck in the trapdoor to the basement. Then I got stuck in a castle while rescuing the princess. After that, I wound up stuck in the background plotting revenge against DK. Well, it’s pretty ironic this time. I’m stuck in the trapdoor again. Yeah, the one that goes to the basement. I thought I filled this hole with cement! I mean, yes, evidently I was wrong, but seriously! Do you know what it’s like getting caught in the same impromptu trap twice?! Call it frustrating, aggravating, humiliating, and just not very pretty. I was just catching up on some reading, set the book down to close the window, and BAM! The floor boards on an axle give way beneath my less-than-stellar weight. There’s quite a bit of regret spinning through my mind right now. If I had gotten  [ Read More ]

I am about 1/100th of a second away from being KOed right now. Just kinda hanging in the background, about to become a bright shiny sparkle. I tell you, those home run bats are killers. I’m also going to tell you that DK is going to be deader than a chewed up Pikmin. When I get my hands on him I’m going to stomp him like a Gumba. Yup. Just as soon as I’m unpaused… I’ll be KOed into the background and come back fresh and fighting! Yeah! Fighting time. Any minute now… … Any time now… … I’m going to beat him down… …and throw him off the edge… … He’s not going to stand a chance… … … Oh, come off it and unpause already!

Hey, Mario! You’ll never guess what happened while you were out at the market this morning! Or were you jogging? Ah, I can’t remember. Anyway, while you were gone, a letter arrived from the Princess that said she’d been kidnapped by Bowser! Well, since you weren’t around, I figured it was up to me to face Bowser at his castle and bring the Princess home safely. You should’ve seen the fight we had! There were fireballs and hammers flying every which way! Well, after some time, I came up with this brilliant plan. See, we were fighting on a bridge over a pool of lava, and I noticed next to the ropes supporting it, there was a fine looking axe. It was just sittin’ there, totally unguarded! So, watching Bowser’s movements carefully, I managed to distract him, then jump over him, grab the axe, and cut that rope! The bridge  [ Read More ]

I don’t mean to be anti-female, but oh my goodness! Peach should not be allowed to drive! I was coming around the corner of Luigi’s Raceway (my favorite track) when she came flying out of nowhere, hardly keeping control of her car, and smashes into the side of me! I spun out and was nailed by Browser and the whole thing was a mess. This isn’t an isolated incident. She’s done this before, and not just to me, to anyone who just so happens to be in her way. The accidents never help her either. It would be one thing if she would run me over and take off to the finish line, or something of that sort, but when she continually is coming up in last place, this isn’t good for anybody! I’ve tried to talk to her about it, but she won’t listen. She says her driving is  [ Read More ]

I was tidying up my room the other day, and I found this account written on a page in one of my many notebooks by my bedside which covered one of the 14 degrees of art I have. (Woodrow Wilson scholarly my foot, but that’s a rant for another time!) Memories. Hmph! 3/8/2001 Well, now I’ve done it. While Mario was off on another of his adventures (I think he calls it “Paper Mario”), I secretly installed a trap door in the floor of the bedroom and constructed a cellar underneath it. I’ve been keeping a diary down there as my own little secret. Something to do while he’s away. So why aren’t I writing this entry in that diary, you ask? Two words: I’m stuck. That’s right, while trying to drop through my trap door, I got stuck in it. I’ve actually been here for three days now. My  [ Read More ]

It’s been awfully quiet on the video game front lately. Forget being paused, we aren’t even being turned on. Things do not bode well when this happens, and some of us are starting to get cabin fever. Bond managed to hack into the Wii Weather Channel this morning, and it’s worse then we figured. The temperature is suppose to be in the 70′s all week! It’s going to be perfect weather for volleyball, baseball, soccer, and frisbee. No one is going to be inside playing video games, this is terrible! Hmm… maybe we just need a virtual frisbee game… I can see it now. Mario Frisbee! Sign me up Nintendo, this is going to be the biggest hit since Pokemon!

So the Wii is out, and guess what? No Mario game! And what’s worse, no Luigi game! When I heard the Wii was coming out I was excited. When I heard that Mario was not going to make it for the Launch I was ecstatic. I started waiting for my agent to call up with news about Luigi’s Mansion II or something like that. Imagine, swinging a Wii controller around like a flashlight. Is that not cool or what? I wait for two weeks, don’t hear a thing from my agent, and decide to give him a call. Two weeks is a long time to not hear from your agent, especially when you think there is a new title for you to be in. Me: “Hey, Charlie! What’s happening man?” Charlie: “Hey… Luigi? How are you doing bud?” Me: “Hey, the Wii is launching soon. You hear anything about a  [ Read More ]