Blogging While Paused

I was tidying up my room the other day, and I found this account written on a page in one of my many notebooks by my bedside which covered one of the 14 degrees of art I have. (Woodrow Wilson scholarly my foot, but that’s a rant for another time!) Memories. Hmph! 3/8/2001 Well, now I’ve done it. While Mario was off on another of his adventures (I think he calls it “Paper Mario”), I secretly installed a trap door in the floor of the bedroom and constructed a cellar underneath it. I’ve been keeping a diary down there as my own little secret. Something to do while he’s away. So why aren’t I writing this entry in that diary, you ask? Two words: I’m stuck. That’s right, while trying to drop through my trap door, I got stuck in it. I’ve actually been here for three days now. My  [ Read More ]

It happened again. I can’t stand when it happens—literally, I can’t! I’ve been paused in midair. It’s been happening to me since as long as I’ve been able to jump. Now don’t get me wrong. I’ve always enjoyed the whole jumping ability I’ve been granted. But I really don’t like it when I get paused on the way up or down. Does it sound like fun to defy gravity? It is… if, say, you do it right with a Wing Cap or some other method of flying. Sitting there suspended in the air without even being able to dangle is nauseating. Super Mario 64 is where it really started to get irksome. Some folks heard me complain about how much more comfortable it would be if I could sit down while paused. Looking like you’re sitting down doesn’t help much while you’re in midair. And then came the worst of  [ Read More ]

I must be the worst boss ever. I mean, look at me! I kidnap a Princess, and hold her captive, IN HER OWN CASTLE! So I’m basically giving Mario home field advantage. He’s over at Peach’s place every other day, if you see where I’m going here. Fixing the plumbing, that kind of thing… … … … On top of that, the stars Mario needs to defeat me, are found in the pictures, in the castle. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what’s going on here! Then there’s my “helpers.” If you can call them that. These stupid bimbos waddle around all over the place, just waiting to be stepped on. All it takes is one foot and “POP”! There goes another goober. I step on about 3 of the stupid things just on my way to the kitchen for afternoon snack! Like these things will ever  [ Read More ]

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