Blogging While Paused

Let Hyrule rot. Let the light world be taken over by darkness. I don’t care. You know why I don’t care? Because no one else does!

These fairy people are starting to get on my nerves. I’m working my way down into the cave of ordeals, and it’s those blasted fairies! You talk to them, and their all like “Hey, I never expected you to make it this far. Good job though! If you want to start over, let me know!”

What?!?! Is this the first fairy that doesn’t refill your health? At least partially? I’m the freaking Hero of Light, and you can’t even refill my health!?!? If you want me to save your pathetic little planet, it might help to show me a little courtesy.

And what’s so magic about the number eight? Why do fairies refill 8 hearts? Why not 10? Why not all your health? I don’t understand why 8 is the magic number. It just doesn’t make sense.

These stupid Hylian people don’t know how good they have it. The all carry on about their pathetic little business, while I, single handedly mind you, VOLUNTEER, to save the world. I even save two worlds this time! What do I get in return? Nothing. Not a thing. Sure, I’m no longer in wolf form and precious little what’s-her-face, gets her memory back. But I don’t get any benefits at all! I have to buy my arrows, I have to buy my bombs, I get to scavenge all over tar-nation looking for rupees and trying to find health.

I don’t even qualify for fringe benefits! This is like the most retarded deal ever. That’s why I have decided to quit. I’d like to officially announce that I am going to stop saving the world, until I am shown a bit more appreciation. If you really care about Hyrule as much as you say you do, prove it.

It’s been fun, a nice good franchise, but I think it’s time I retire. I found a nice little island a few clips to the west of my grandparents house, you can find me there when you change your mind.